WHAT'S WRONG WITH DOUCHEBAGS?

The term "douchebag" is so commonly used as a term of derision, or in the context of an insult, that it's hard to remember that a true douchebag is a health care product. That's right- if you don't have enough "douchebags" in your life already, you can actually go down to Walgreen's and buy yourself one. Not only that, but they are cheap and come with a variety of pleasant-smelling concoctions.
WHY DO DOUCHEBAGS EXIST?
Douchebags have probably been around for thousands of years, like beer or giant pyramids. They came into common use in the Victorian era, and at that time they were primarily used as a form of birth control. Condoms at that time were not very reliable, and birth control pills and IUDs did not yet exist. Short of the "rhythm method," in which couples tried to avoid intercourse around a woman's ovulation, douchebags were really all someone could count on in days of yore. They were also used in preparation for intercourse, a use that was popularized by prostitutes- this was to keep the vagina "fresh." So you can think of douchebags historically as functioning as a sort of perfume before sex, and as a way to wash out semen after sex, to prevent pregnancy.
THE PROBLEM WITH DOUCHEBAGS
Though "douching" has become more sanitary, the problems is that douchebags don't really accomplish either of their historical functions very well. In addition, they can create problems of their own. Here's why you should avoid douching if at all possible:
1. Using douchebags is a terrible way to prevent pregnancy. Sperm are fast, and they hang on tight to the reproductive system. It can take less than a second for a sperm to make its way up to the Fallopian tube, where it is difficult to flush out. Douching will only flush out the stragglers, leaving a few million sperm unharmed.
2. Douching may actually flush something bad IN: the vagina and uterus do a very respectable job inhibiting the growth of harmful bacteria and other microbes, the kind that can cause sexually transmitted diseases (STDs). Many STDs are able to get through these defenses, causing an annoying and painful infection. But these same STDs, particularly gonorrhea, can cause a much more dangerous infection called Pelvic Inflammatory Disease if they get beyond the uterus and into the Fallopian tubes. Because of the fluid pressure douchebags cause, they can actually push infectious organisms higher into the reproductive tract. There is a higher risk of Pelvic Inflammatory Disease, or severe reproductive infections, in women who douche; never mind the fact that douching does not prevent any STDs.
3. Douching has little to no affect on vaginal odor. The vagina is colonized by good, healthy bacteria, and it is these bacteria and your own natural vaginal secretions that produce odor, if you want to call it that. The vagina is also very active in maintaining its own fluid and chemistry. While douching may temporarily flush the vagina with a nice aromatic floral rinse, any resulting scent will be removed within minutes, not hours. Even frequent douching is unlikely to have any substantial impact on vaginal odor.
In short: unless you go through a time machine and find yourself in Victorian times, don't mess around with douchebags!